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Boat Splits in Half

18 Dec 2022

A man and his wife are out sailing on their boat when a huge storm suddenly appears out of nowhere. The wife becomes very frightened and begs her husband to head for shore, but he insists that they can ride out the storm. As the winds grow stronger and the waves get higher, the wife [...]


John and the rude parrot

17 Dec 2022

A young man named John received a parrot as a gift. The parrot had a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary. Every word out of the bird's mouth was rude, obnoxious and laced with profanity. John tried and tried to change the bird's attitude by consistently saying only polite words, playing soft music and [...]


The Boy and The Berber

17 Dec 2022

A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his customer, "This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you." The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, "Which do you want, [...]


mathew 7 vs 7

19 Nov 2017

A man saw a catholic nun and decided to give her a lift in his car.As the car was moving the man placed his hand on the laps of the nun pretending he was looking for the gear lever.The nun cast a glance at him and said Matthew chapter 7 vs 7".The man quickly removed [...]


A great pair of balls

20 Sep 2017

A soldier ran up to a nun. Out of breath he asked, "Please, may I hide under your skirt. I'll explain later." The nun agreed. A moment later two Military Police ran up and asked, "Sister, have you seen a soldier?" The nun replied, "He went that way." After the Military Police ran off, the [...]


johnny asks the teacher

10 Sep 2017

johnny was sitting in class doing math problems when his teacher picked him to answer a question, "johnny, if there were five birds sitting on a fence and you shot one with your gun, how many would be left?" "None," replied johnny, "cause the rest would fly away." "Well, the answer is four," said the [...]


policeman and a farmer

10 Sep 2017

A policeman stops at a ranch in the rural area and talks with an old farmer. He tells the farmer, 'I need to inspect your farm for illegally grown drugs.' The old farmer says, 'Okay, but don't go in that field over there.' The policeman verbally explodes saying, 'Mister, I have the authority of the [...]


before marriage and after marriage

6 Sep 2017

BEFORE MARRIAGE: BOY: I have been waiting for this day GIRL: Do you want me to leave? BOY: No GIRL: Do you love me? BOY: Of course GIRL: Will you ever cheat on me? BOY: Never in my life GIRL: Will you ever kiss me? BOY: Every chance i get GIRL: Will you hit me [...]


Meet uncle waxy

1 Sep 2017

Dear Uncle Waxy; I am a lady aged 26, and my husband is 34. I left my husband with the maid and our baby at home. After driving for just about 2 km from home, my car engine started to over-heat. So I had to return and get the other car. When I got home [...]


Nkaka knows the whole truth

1 Sep 2017

A rich man's son who was classmate to nkaka told him that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret & that this makes it very easy to blackmail them by saying, "I know the whole truth." So nkaka decided to go home & try it out. He got home & as he is [...]


Mad man in the hospital

1 Sep 2017

MAD MAN:- Hello doctor, i have got a problem DOCTOR:- What is it? MAD MAN:- Every night i always dream of cows playing soccer! DOCTOR:- Oooh wow, take this pill before you sleep tonight MAD MAN :- Ok doctor, i will start tommorrow, because those cows they're playing finals tonight!


Steven spielberg and a chinese guy

1 Sep 2017

A Chinese walks into a bar in America late one night and he saw Steven Spielberg. As he was a great fan of his movies, he rushes over to him, and asks for his autograph. Instead, Spielberg gives him a slap and says, "You Chinese people bombed our Pearl Harbour, get out of here." The [...]


Wife knows the truth

1 Sep 2017

Oneday a woman wanted to know how the husband would react if she left without telling him where she had gone. So she decided to write him a letter saying she is tired of him and didn't want to live with him anymore and after writing she put the letter on the table in the [...]


Little Johnny is forced to pray

27 Aug 2017

Little johnny was Ordered To Pray before they could go to sleep for the Night... Little johnny: I Don't Know How To Pray… Dad: Just Pray For Every Thing You Know about The Family And Our Neighbours. Little johnny: Mummy, Please, Tell Daddy I Can't Pray! Mummy: Shut Up, If You Don't Pray You'll Not [...]


mum and son

28 May 2017

mum: what are you going to do today? johnny: nothing. mum: but you did nothing the whole of yesterday! johnny: i didn't finish


abnormal phenomena

28 Jul 2014

A peculiarly scary thing was happening in a hospital's ICU. Every Sunday, with unfailing regularity, patients on bed number 5 died at 11 AM. This puzzled the doctors and some even thought that it had something to do with the supernatural. To investigate the cause of such bizarre incidents, the doctors and nurses decide to [...]


Doctor's Scary Answer

28 Jul 2014

Alarmed by the prolonged discussions of his case by a group of doctors by his bedside, a patient said, "There must be something terribly wrong with me." "Why do you say that?" asked the doctor. "All the other doctors seem to disagree with your diagnosis." "Don't you worry." consoled the doctor. "In a similar case [...]


heaven's lie clocks

24 Feb 2014

A man died and went to heaven. As he stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. He asked, "What are all those clocks?" St. Peter answered, "Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock. Every time you lie the hands on your [...]


password reset trouble

17 Feb 2014

"Sorry, your password has been in use for 30 days and has expired - you must register a new one." roses "Sorry, too few characters." pretty roses "Sorry, you must use at least one numerical character." 1 pretty rose "Sorry, you cannot use blank spaces." 1prettyrose "Sorry, you must use at least 10 different characters." [...]


kill a donkey

13 May 2013

Two terrorists having discussion in a bar. A waiter happens to get what the discussion was about and makes an inquiry... Terrorist : We are planning to kill 14 thousand people and a donkey.. Waiter : A donkey....Why a donkey? Then one terrorist says to the other, "See I told you nobody will care about [...]


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